DWH 2

CHAPTER 2

            DOCTRINE WRITING PROCESS

Section 2-1 Research

1.   Research and Development (R & D) is the second phase of the AFP Doctrine Development Process. At this stage, the Project Monitoring Team (PMT), which has earlier been designated by the Proponents for the proposed doctrine publication/manual project, and the doctrine writers proceed to perform various data gathering and other writing tasks as required by the doctrine publication project.

FOR IMPROVEMENT - DRAFT FIGURE ONLY

Writing brief. Based on the guidance provided by the Proponents that includes writing briefs and other references, the doctrine writers shall prepare a research plan and schedule for approval by the Project Officers/Proponents. Upon approval of the said plan and schedule, the doctrine writers shall undertake the research and development of the draft. They may introduce new constructs into the research with prior consultation with the Project Officers/Proponents;

In the context of the AFP doctrine development process, research entails various tasks. These tasks include the following:

a.      Data gathering

1)     In writing new doctrine publications/manuals, as well as the revision of outdated versions, the PMT and doctrine writer shall be guided by the Table of Contents contained in the approved PAd. The doctrine writer, assisted by the PMT, shall conduct a survey of current literature and gather other data, specifically the most current laws, directives, rules and regulations and other relevant issuances from all available sources on the topics to be discussed. 

2)     For the revision of doctrine publications/manuals/tactics, techniques and procedures (TTPs), the PMT shall provide the doctrine writer a printed or electronic copy of the publication to be revised.

3)   Both the survey of literature and data gathering are common activities to the writing and revision doctrine publications/manuals.

Interviews with subject matter experts shall also be performed as they are valuable sources of current information. During the consultative conferences among the PMT, doctrine writers and the Proponent, the progress of the writing activity is determined, more data are gathered, and data and information on hand are validated.

b.      Literature review and data check. It is essential that the PMT and doctrine writer examine the collected data and information for appropriateness. The appropriateness of data may be assessed based on the following characteristics:

1)     completeness (all required data are in);

2)     consistency (no contradictions even as data is obtained from various

sources);

3)     accuracy (both textual and numerical data are correct);

4)     validity (applicability of the data at hand to topic); and,

5)     timeliness (currency,  relevance, responsiveness).

Section 2-2 Doctrine Writing

1.   Doctrine writing as expository writing.

Doctrine writing is largely expository writing, which is defined in the Stanford

University website as “a type of written discourse that is used to explain, describe, give information or inform”.  Expository writing that instructs and informs about various topics is differentiated from persuasive writing, scientific or technical writing (that describes experiments or details processes), autobiographical or personal writing (that records or expresses one’s own observation and ideas), and creative writing (that outputs a work of art).

      We encounter expository writings on a daily basis. Past schoolwork consisted of many term papers and tests that have required answers in essay form.  Autobiographies and other non-fiction novels and accounts of particular events and features in magazines and newspapers are largely expository. The workplace requires various reports to inform superiors and other personnel about significant events and the state of the enterprise. Expository writings inform on, instruct about, explain, or describe particular topics.

      

2. Forms of expository writing in doctrine writing:

a.      The first pages of many doctrine publications/manuals that contain office

or unit histories are forms of expository writing, particularly using the sequence pattern where events and other historic information are presented in chronological order. 

b.      The description pattern of expository writing is widely used in doctrine

writing such as the narration of organizational characteristics (core competencies and capabilities), the depiction of the hierarchy and structure of an office/unit, as well as office and personnel duties and function. It is also a suitable writing pattern in the presentation of processes and procedures, and programs and activities, as well as career advancement plans and inventories of facilities and materiel.

c.      The presentation of comparative or contrasting sets of data or information

in order to fully inform and update the doctrine publication/manual user may be facilitated with the use of the comparison pattern that explains why two or more items or processes are alike or are different.    

Table 2.1 Selected Expository Writing Patterns

Pattern	Description	Cue Words
Description	The writer  describes a topic by listing characteristics, features, and examples	for example; the characteristics are
Sequence	The writer lists items or events in numerical or chronological order.	first, second, third; next; then; finally
Comparison	The writer explains how two or more things are alike and/or how they are different.	different; in contrast; alike; same as; on the other hand

Source: Mastering the Writing Process by Caryn Gracey

3. Old writing models. Traditional writing was a three-step process consisting of pre-writing, writing, and re-writing, which steps were to be performed sequentially.  Later researches have revealed that this writing model is inadequate and tends to box in the writers and impede their flow of creative juices.

The other old writing models include the Stage Model of Writing that has four (4) steps namely: Create goals, Formulate an outline, Write based on the outline, and Re-read/Revise the finished product, and the Process Model, which has twice more steps as it consists of Planning, Idea Generation, Organizing, Goal Setting, Translating, Reviewing, Evaluating, and Revising.

The doctrine writer is free to choose a writing model or not adhere to a writing model at all. Current doctrine writing experience would however show that writers necessarily, but not always consciously, go through a certain number of steps that correspond to those that comprise the Stage or Process Models or some other writing paradigms.

4. PMT as “monitors”. A most important factor in the newer writing models is what rhetoricians call the "monitor" whose task, overseeing the writing process, is likened to the manner that a general oversees a battle being waged.  The monitor may issue either a retreat-or-move-forward order or decide when to move from one process to the next. 

A writer may heed the guidance of a PMT monitor or the writer’s “other self” that comes forward each time the writer decides to check what has been written or when stumped or lost and momentarily unable to write.

In addition to a personal monitor, the draft outputs of doctrine writers, regardless of whether they are contracted civilians or uniformed personnel, are subject to the monitoring authority of the appropriate Project Officer (as provided by AFPM 8-03), who is tasked to check the development of the doctrine publication/manual in terms of content and substance (outline structure) and timeline. 

5. At the outset, the Doctrine Writers shall observe the prescribed writing format, in addition to other guidelines on style, grammar and visual presentations. They shall ensure that the drafts are precise in both language and substance, the topics/subject matters are systematically and objectively presented and in accordance with the approved Table of Contents, and sufficient based on the requirements of the writing briefs and other guidance. Annex C - Doctrine Format from the AFP Doctrine Development Manual prescribes the layout of the chapters, paragraphs, graphics and tables, and states that the Pagination is Chapter Nr; then Page Nr. In the given example, “1-3”, “1” shall refer to the chapter number, and “3” shall refer to the third page within the chapter. In the case of annexes, the first digit is replaced by the annex letter.

While the doctrine writers are responsible to and work under the direction of the Proponent, they are free to explore related doctrines and to formulate new but justifiable constructs other than those of the Proponents. Their main tasks, however, shall be the formulation and writing of doctrines based on exhaustive research, studies, and consultations. They may seek guidance from the Proponents, who serve as both advisers and sources of assistance, and may request assistance from the AFPDDC through the Project Officer. They shall comply with the requirements of the AFPDDC such as the submission of progress reports (drafts), conduct of presentations, and compliance with project schedule.

5. Writer’s Draft

     

a.      Based on the approved Table of Contents, a narrative on the various approved topic(s) – called a Writer’s Draft - is prepared by a doctrine writer and submitted to the Proponent through the PMT. The Writer’s Draft must contain as much necessary information that has been made available to or has been secured by the doctrine writer.  The Writer’s Draft shall be revised based on the inputs provided by the other members of the PMT and recorded by the doctrine writer in such manner as to obtain clearer connection among the ideas received. Careful editing that can be performed at any point during the writing should result in both good grammar and the observance of the prescribed format.

b.      Early on in the writing of AFP doctrine publications/manuals, the doctrine writer is already provided with various inputs such as the purpose and audience of the publication to be written. The purpose is to provide information, explain ideas and instruct, thus, the suitable writing pattern is expository. As with purpose, the audience or the readership of the publication is likewise identified in the PAd and usually stated as all AFP officers and personnel, their dependents and authorized civilians, and the stakeholders of the proponent offices. AFP doctrine publications/manuals must, therefore, be written following the elements of style (coherent and efficient use of language) that heavily bear on comprehension. Style, as well as editing and proofreading, will be more extensively discussed in succeeding portions of this chapter.

c.      The 1991 U.S. Army Command and General Staff College Student Text identifies four (4) elements of written communication namely:  (1) substance, (2) organization, (3) style, and (4) correctness. These elements are discussed as follows:

1)     Substance is the idea one is trying to communicate, the thought behind what you are saying; the very purpose of communicating. Effective writing requires that the substance or the information contained in a publication be relevant to the purpose of the publication and does not waste reader’s time, that the substance be focused on  a single controlling idea, with appropriate scope and clearly and simply written, with sufficient information and able to respond to  relevant questions. In the matter of writing AFP doctrine publications, ensuring sufficiency of substance or content entails checking whether a draft contains the necessary information required by the table of contents as contained in the approved PAd.

2)     Organization is the arrangement of parts, i.e. the big parts such chapters and small parts such as sentences that are essential to the understanding of ideas. Coherent paragraph have singleness of purpose and focus, logical and smooth sentences, and exact word choice.

3)     Style involves how well one understands something and how quickly something is understood. It is the coherence and the efficiency of language and it complements solid substance and clear organization, the first two elements of communication. The fourth element, correctness, like style, also refers to correct spelling, punctuation, readability, and subject-verb agreement.

a)     Correct spelling. Spelling errors are committed even by seasoned writers. It is important that commonly confused words, such as affect/effect, are checked to make sure that the correct words are used. Together with incorrectly written abbreviations and acronyms, and improper capitalization, these errors of style may drag down the quality of a writing draft.  (Annex __ -  Frequently Misspelled Words)

b)     Punctuation. The various punctuation marks serve to regulate the flow of information through a sentence, showing readers how to read ideas. Selected punctuation marks are identified and their use explained as follows:

·        A comma separates parts of a sentence; a comma alone does not separate one sentence from another. Commas can be used to set off an appositive phrase, but a pair of dashes is preferable when appositive phrases from a list containing commas. (Annex __ -  When to Use and When Not to Use a Comma)

Example: The contents of my knapsack – longganisa,

fried sweet potato, coffee, and ripe mangoes—made me want to rush to the picnic grove.

·        A dash (--) alerts readers to an explanation, to something unexpected, or to an interruption. Form a dash by typing two hyphens, putting no extra space before, between, or after them. Recent software will transform the two hyphens into one continuous dash. A dash should be followed by a phrase, not a clause.

                  Examples:    

o       Armed with a single weapon—a drawn sword—he faced his attackers.

o       The victim gasped, “Don’t let him get the -–“ and fainted.

o       In Palawan there are at least two types of off-city destinations – day-trips and overnight get-aways.

The dash must be used sparingly since overusing this punctuation mark may produce a staccato effect.

o       An apostrophe (-‘) indicates ownership or possession. It can

also signal omitted letters as in who’s or can’t. (Annex __ -  When to Use and When Not to use an Apostrophe)

Examples:  Fred’s books (the books belonging to Fred)

                    the government’s plans (the plans of the government)

                    a year’s pay (the pay for a year).

·                    Double quotation marks (“ “)indicate where someone’s exact

words begin and end.   (Annex __ - Quotation Marks: Basic Guidelines)

·                                Semicolons and Colons. A colon (:) may look like a semicolon (;).

A colon is two dots; the semicolon, a dot above a comma. They are however used in different ways, and they are not interchangeable.  (Annex __ - When to Use and When Not to Use a Semicolon; Annex __ - When to Use and When Not to Use a Colon)

·                                Periods (.) are used at the end of sentences.  They are used to

end a sentence that makes a statement or gives a command. Periods, not question marks are also used to end a sentence concluding with an indirect question.  Periods are also used with abbreviations, decimals, and with amounts over a peso. When a sentence ends with an abbreviation, it is not necessary to add an extra period. While periods are generally used to signal an abbreviation, a distinct feature of military writing is the absence of periods after abbreviations.

                     Examples: 5.4, ₱2.95

     ●    A question mark (?) at the end of a sentence signals a direct question.  Use a period after an indirect question.

Examples: 

What is she doing?

I wonder what she is doing.

·                    An exclamation point (!) at the end of a sentence indicates that

the writer considers the statement amazing, surprising, or extraordinary. It can be used, together with a question mark and an exclamation point with a period that signals an abbreviation.

·        Parentheses [( )]are used to mark an aside or provide additional information.

Example: Manny “Pacman” Pacquiao has made world boxing history (winning eight major international boxing titles).

Parentheses are also used to enclose citations in a documented paper and to enclose numbers preceding items in a list.

Example:  (3) A paper submitted to the AFP CGSC in early 2000 recommended that the doctrine proposal and doctrine development steps in doctrine development be strengthened to enhance doctrine formulation (Mendoza 5).

At the end of a sentence, place the period inside the last parenthesis only when a separate new sentence is enclosed.

Example: Pacman has made boxing the second Philippine national sports. (In addition, the country is reported as safer during his fight showings because almost no crimes are reported.)

·                                            Brackets

o       Square brackets ([  ]) are used to enclose the inserted or changed material when inserting words or commas or making changes to words within a quotation. 

                      Example: According to Ridley, “the key to both of these features of

life [the ability to reproduce and to create order] is information.”

Square brackets may also be used to insert the Latin word sic  

(meaning “thus”) into a quoted passage in which an error occurs. Using sic tells readers that the word or words that it follows were present in the original source and are not your own.

Example: The AFP Physical Fitness program aims to encourage servicemen to “exercise to strengthen abominable [sic] muscles.”

o                               Angle brackets (< >) are used to enclose e-mail addresses, uniform resource locators (URLs) and other Web site addresses.

Example:   AFPDDC

Various other punctuation marks communicate essential information in Web site addresses. All marks must be included in writing e-mail addresses, and when it becomes necessary to spread a URL over more than one line, it must be split after a slash or before a punctuation mark.  The protocol (http://) must not be split.

Example: The American Psychological Association, whose Web site is at http://www.apa.org, provides examples of documenting Web sources.

·        Ellipsis dots.  Appearing like three (3) spaced dots (. . .), ellipsis dots are used to indicate omitted material (ellipsis) from the middle of a quotation. When words are omitted from a quotation at the end of a sentence, ellipsis dots shall be inserted after the period (making four spaced dots in all) and enclosed in quotation marks.

A complete sentence omitted from a quoted paragraph shall be indicated by three (3) ellipsis dots. 

Ellipsis dots shall not be used when quoting only a word or phrase (as it is obvious that material has been omitted).

           

·        Slash (/).   A slash or solidus is used to separate two or three lines of

poetry quoted within the text. It is also used in expressions such as and/or and he/she to indicate options. The use of the solidus or slash punctuation, however, must be avoided in doctrine writing.

c)      Summary of Uses of Punctuation Marks. The following table summarizes

the common punctuations marks and the purposes they serve:

Table 2.2 Summary of Uses of Punctuation Marks

Purpose	Options
Overall purpose: To end a sentence ·        To mark where a sentence ends ·        To indicate the end of a sentence with a close connection to the next sentence	Period, question mark, or exclamation point (. ? !), Semicolon (;)
Overall purpose: To separate ·        To separate independent clauses only when a connecting word (and, but, or, nor, so, for, or yet) is used ·        To separate introductory words, a phrase, or a clause from a following independent clause ·        To separate items (words, phrases, clauses) in a list (x, y, and z) ·        To separate items  in a list that contains internal commas (x, x; y, y; and z) ·        To separate certain adjectives ·        To separate a verb from a quoted statement that follows or precedes it ·        To separate lines of poetry written as running text	Comma (,) Comma (,) Comma (,) Semicolon (;) Comma (,) Comma (,) Slash (/)
Overall purpose: To insert ·        To insert a word, words, or an “extra information” (nonrestrictive) phrase or clause into a sentence ·        To give more emphasis to the insert ·        To insert a change within a quotation ·        To insert explanatory information	Commas (,,) Dashes (--) Square brackets [ ] Parentheses ( )
Overall purpose: To anticipate an explanation or a list	Colon (:)
Overall purpose: To quote ·        To quote exact words or give the title of a story, a poem, or an article ·        To enclose a quotation within another quotation	Double quotation marks (“ ”) Single quotation marks
Overall purpose: To delete from a quotation	Ellipsis dots ( . . .)
Overall purpose: To indicate possession ·        For most words ·        For nouns forming the plural with s	Apostrophe + s (‘s) Apostrophe after the s (s’)

Source: Keys for Writers 5^th ed. by Ann Raimes

c)      Readability. Vital references such as AFP doctrine publications must be

readable, must make use of distinctive vocabulary choices (good diction), be comprehensible and applicable (utile), and enjoyable (user-friendly, not alienating). Readability may be achieved through the proper use or references for pronouns, tone, the use of non-discriminatory language, the preferred use of the active voice as against the passive voice, the avoidance of strong, emotionally-charged words, and subject-verb agreement. 

·        Proper use or references for pronouns. Pronouns are words that substitute

for a noun, a noun phrase or another pronoun. In writing, a pronoun refers to its antecedent (a noun or noun phrase appearing just before it in the text. When using pronouns, determine the following: What word or words in the sentence does the pronoun refer to? Does the pronoun refer to a noun or pronoun that is singular or plural?

Example: My best friend enjoys her state-of-the-art mobile phone, but she lost it to a pickpocket last night. (her and she refers to friend, while it refers to phone)

Table 2.3 Summary of Forms of Personal Pronouns

Person	Subject	Object	Possessive (+ Noun)	Possessive (Stands Alone)	Intensive and Reflexive
1st person singular	I	me	my	mine	myself
2nd person singular	you	you	your	yours	yourself/ yourselves
3rd person singular	he she it	him          her it	his her its	his hers Its (rare)	himself herself itself
1st person plural	we	us	our	ours	ourselves
3rd person plural	they	them	their	theirs	themselves

·        Tone. While speakers have voice and gestures to help them

communicate, writers only have words on paper. Doctrine writing requires a formal, unbiased, respectful tone that will elicit appreciation and compliance of rules contained therein, as well as valuable feedback. Formal writing denotes the use of accepted rules of grammar, among others. To write politely is to write reasonably, that is with the proper bases, and persuasively, that is using the most effective words. Writing in a respectful tone relates to the next topic on politically-correct writing.

·        Use of non-exclusionary language and images. While writing is often performed from a perspective that a writer is familiar with, divisive terms may foster gender bias and stereotyping, and alienate special-interest groups. Among the areas of concern in the matter of biased language are gender, ethnicity and race, place, age, politics, religion, health and abilities, and, sexual orientation. Doctrine writing that considers that men and women make up the country’s armed forces is gender-sensitive and respectful doctrine writing. DND Circular Nr 01 (Annex C) also contains suggestions on how to use gender-fair language. Visual aids must likewise show a range of people – AFP personnel (both men and women), Christian and Muslim chaplains, etc. – and avoid portraying stereotyping of jobs, e.g.  women soldiers typing doing clerical work, etc.  (Annex __ - Using Images)

·        Use of the active voice as against the passive voice. Unnecessary passive voice constructions tend to create wordy, uninteresting statements.  Whenever possible, use the active voice especially when you mention who or what is doing the action.

Examples: 

o       (Passive)        The homesick troops in Mindanao were entertained by several batches of movie and TV personalities last Christmas.

o       (Active)           Several batches of movie and TV personalities entertained the homesick troops last Christmas.

·        Avoidance of strong, emotionally-charged words.     Doctrine publications shall not contain strong words, such as vivid verbs and other intense, passionate  words and should their use be inevitable, such words shall not be repeated unnecessarily

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

·        Subject-Verb Agreement. In Standard English,  a third person singular subject in the present tense takes a singular verb (with –s), and a plural subject takes a plural verb (with no –s). (Annex __ - Subject-Verb Agreement)

4)     Correctness is the last element of written communication and, as earlier

stated, entails correct spelling, readability, punctuation, and good subject-verb agreement, topics which have earlier been discussed. (It is described as the least contributory factor to meaning and purpose but may drag down the more important elements of communication.) Correctness includes the correct usage of acronyms, abbreviations, signs and symbols and capitalization.

·        Usage of Acronyms.      Acronyms are formed from the initial letters or

key components in a word or phrase.  They may consist of individual letters where each letter is written in upper case or parts of words where the first letter of each abbreviated word is uppercased.  The exceptions are 1) copyrighted logos or word forms established by law, and 2) word forms that have become common nouns, e.g. radar (radio detecting and ranging), scuba (self-contained underwater breathing apparatus).  (Annex __ – Usage of Acronyms)

Examples:  

CSAFP – Chief of Staff, Armed Forces of the Philippines

APC – armored personnel carrier

LD – line of departure

LAW – light anti-tank weapon

WestMinCom - Western Mindanao Command

For consistency, military ranks, the designations for morning and evening, and other comparable shortened word forms shall be treated as acronyms.

Examples:

CPT – captain

SGT – sergeant

AM – morning or ante meridian

PM – post meridian

The plurals for most acronyms shall be formed by the addition of a lowercase “s”,

Examples:  LAWs, NCOs, SOPs

An “s” shall not be added to form the plurals of acronyms whose meanings are plural.

Examples: PSYOP (Psychological Operations) play an important role in low- intensity conflict.

                 PIR (Priority Intelligence Requirements) are essential to

planning the suppression operation.

To avoid using a lowercase “s” in a title that is otherwise entirely uppercased, plural items in titles shall be written out.

Examples:  IDENTIFYING MILITARY OCCUPATIONAL SPECIALTIES instead of      

                   IDENTIFYING MOSs.

The traditional rules for forming singular and plural possessives shall apply to acronyms.

Examples: The duty roster is on the NCO’s desk. (Singular possessive).

                  The NCO’s recommendations are excellent. (Plural possessive).

A common error in using acronyms is redundancy.

Examples: Write FS (not FS support); FS stands for Fire Support.

       Write PSYOP (not PSYOP operations); PSYOP stands for

       psychological operations.

In addition, no alternate word form shall have more than one meaning in the same publication.

Example: CP, referring to command post in one section of a publication, shall not refer to checkpoint in another.

·        Signs and symbols. If readers are expected to understand technical

symbols, these must be defined in the definition of terms.  Symbols, however, may used when referring to temperature, gravity, angles or coordinates.

Examples:  8°C (Note: If Celsius is written out, then write out the

word degrees.)

                             30’

                             15’20°

·        Abbreviations.   It is necessary to spell out abbreviations the first time

they appear in each chapter of a doctrine publication. If they appear only twice  or infrequently, spell out the terms every time and avoid the abbreviation entirely. Clarity must be put before economy. In the case of various abbreviations introduced by electronics, such as CD-ROM, RAM, PIN and others, doctrine writers must guard against the use of abbreviations found in informal on-line communications. (Annex __- Rules on Abbreviations)

·                    Capitalization. Capitalized common nouns are observed to abound in military writing. There are rules that govern capitalization in sentences (as opposed to titles or headings). Proper nouns and adjectives shall be capitalized. Common nouns and adjectives shall be written in lowercase. (www.getitwriteonline.com/archive/ 011309Capitalization). It is commonly known that the first letter of the first word of a sentence is capitalized even if it is not a complete sentence. There are rules in capitalization and the same rules apply to both military and non-military writing except for the use of periods after abbreviated titles. (Annex __ - Rules of Capitalization)

Section 2-3   Review and Revision (recommended for deletion)

While the PCD that has been formulated is well-anchored on official and current references, subjecting the concepts and constructs, and rules and processes it contains to test, evaluation and validation transforms the PCD into an authoritative reference. Upon approval and promulgation by the CSAFP, the tested, evaluated and validated war fighting concepts are transformed in to doctrines.

                                           Section 2-4 Editing and Proofreading

Editing and proofreading are both writing processes and are part of the revision phase.  While both demand close and careful reading, editing and proofreading focus on different aspects of writing and employ different techniques.  (Annex  __ - Computer Tools for Editing)

           

      a.   Editing strategies.  Editing strategies are mainly focused on four aspects:     

1)     Target readers/users of the publication.  In presenting technical information to both technical and non-technical readers, technical terms (jargon) shall be defined,  and diagrams and images utilized to enhance comprehension;

2)     Sentence punctuation. Punctuation errors are distracting. Care should be taken so that periods, semicolons, and commas are correctly used with coordinating conjunctions;

3)     Sentence quality.  Well-written sentences are not wordy and the use of clichés is minimized. A cliché is defined as an expression, idea, or element of an art work that has been overused to the point of losing its original meaning or effect; and,

4)     Grammar. Editing for grammatical correctness may be facilitated by asking a few questions such as follows:

a)     Are there any errors in subject-verb agreement?

b)     Are there any errors in pronoun usage?

c)      Does the writing switch from present tense to past tense?

b.               Levels of editing

Editing usually focuses on sentences (or even smaller elements of the text) and may involve extensive rewriting of sentences.  There are five (5) known levels of editing namely: content, overall structure, structure within paragraphs, clarity, style and citation.

1)     Editing for content primarily entails checking whether a draft contains the necessary elements or information required by the table of contents as contained in the approved PAd. In addition, all parts of the draft shall be focused and contain only relevant information.

2)     Good overall structure, the internal structure or logical pattern of ideas within a piece of writing, is essential to the understanding of ideas or the substance, which a military doctrine or any publication intends to convey. These ideas or substance is the very purpose of the publication. In addition to the information required in the introduction and conclusion, good overall structure or organization in a draft is manifested by the close relation of each paragraph in the body to the overall topic. Moreover, paragraphs are arranged in a logical sequence and there are clear transitions between paragraphs.

3)     Good structure within paragraphs requires that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and each paragraph sticks to one main idea.

4)     A draft passes the test for clarity intelligible when all important terms are clearly defined and the meaning of each sentence is clear.

Sentences and paragraphs may lose intelligibility as a result of confusion

in word usage or choice of words.  (Annex __  – Easily Confused Words)

c. Quoting. This is done when using the words of a well-known authority or when the words are particularly striking. Quoting must be done only when the original words express the exact point the writer desires to make and to express it succinctly and well. Otherwise, paraphrasing must be done. When quoting,  the writer may ask the following questions:  Which point of mine does the quotation illustrate? Why am I considering quoting this particular passage? Why should this particular passage be quoted rather than paraphrased? What do I need to tell my readers about the author of the quotation?

d.      Citation

1)     Doctrine writers must ensure that quotes, paraphrases, and ideas from various sources, including AFP publications, are appropriately cited and that citations are written in the correct format. (Annex __ - APA Citation Style)

2)     What to cite: All sources that have been referred to must be carefully cited and documented. Information about the author, title, publication data, page numbers, Internet address, dates – whatever is available – must be provided in order that readers can locate the sources and read them for further information.

3)     Sources must also be documented to preclude questions about which words and ideas are original and which belong to others (authors, interviewed experts, etc.).

4)     The following are some basic citation rules: 

a)     Cite all facts, statistics, and pieces of information. However, citation is not necessary for facts regarded as common knowledge, such as dates of  the date of Philippine Independence,; facts available in many sources, such as author’s birth and death dates and chronological events; or allusions to folktales that have been handed down through the ages, etc.  When in doubt about whether or not a fact is common knowledge, cite your source;

b)     Cite exact words from your source, enclosed in quotation marks;

c)      Cite somebody else’s ideas and opinions, even if you restate them in your own words in a summary or paraphrase; and,

d)     Cite each sentence in a long paraphrase (if it is not clear that all the sentences paraphrase the same original source).

e.      Paraphrasing.  Paraphrasing, also termed as summarizing, is done by

selecting the main points expressed by an author or other source materials and presenting them briefly and in one’s own words “without commentary or interpretation”. It is common practice to indicate the author’s name and the publication year of the cited material within or after the statement paraphrased from another work. (Annex __ - How to paraphrase)

Examples:

·        Bautista (1992) identified…

·        Several researchers (Zaide, 1990; Ocampo & Diaz, 1985; Nakpil et al., 1980) reported …

·        Or at the end of a sentence paraphrased from another work (Valdez, 1992).

f.        Proofreading.  Proofreading is the last step that writers perform to ensure

that the document is presentable and effective?  It generally involves only minor changes in spelling and punctuation and is undertaken only after the writer has completed all other editing revisions. Proofreading is undertaken for the following reasons:

1.      Better comprehension of written documents rely on how

information is presented and laid out;

2.                  While content is what really matters, the way a paper

looks affects the way others judge it; and,

3.      Comprehensive and accurate content and proper form are

requirements of the AFP doctrine style.

Strategies in proofreading

1)     While writers and proofreaders vary in their manner of proofreading, most proofreaders start with common problem areas, e.g. punctuation, sentence completeness, etc., concentrate on typographical or encoding errors, and read from the end to the beginning to check for both typographical and spelling errors.

2)      A thorough proofreading session may comprise of the following activities:

a)     Proofread one sentence at a time – from end of the paper to the

beginning. Reading in an out of context manner enables a proofreader to detect common flaws and errors; 

b)     Proofread one more time;

c)      Read the paper aloud; hearing errors can lead to better detection than reading; and,

d)     Proofread slowly - read each word from right to left, then left to right on each page.

g.      Preparing the Definition of Terms. To enhance comprehension of the doctrine, as well as forestall confusion, it is necessary to define the terms that are not commonly used or that may have several meanings. A list of these terms with their corresponding definitions shall be provided as part of the publication to be known as the Definition of Terms. (Annex __ - Defining terms)